Trust Your Feelings
I once received the advice to “trust my feelings”, and honestly, the worst advice I ever got! All it did, was get me in a really bad situation.
What does that mean anyway? What exactly must I trust?
Must I trust that my feelings are real in the sense that I am actually having them and they remind me that I am alive and experiencing life? Then yes, feelings are trustworthy. But if you are asking me to trust my feelings as a guide to understanding what is happening in my life, as a gauge to determine the truth of a situation, or as a reason to behave in a certain way, then there is no way I am trusting my feelings. In that sense my feelings are untrustworthy, constantly changing and at times totally irrational. Trusting them would not only be dangerous, but definitely not wise.
“A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back.” (Proverbs 29:11 NKJV)
There is wisdom in not following your feelings. It is ok to have them, but what you do with them can shape your life in a way you never expected.
Feelings may not be accurate and so should always be evaluated.
Hugh Prather the writer of ‘Notes to Myself’ said:
Both my body and my emotions are given to me, and is as futile for me to condemn myself for being scared, insecure, selfish, or revengeful as it is for me to get mad at myself for the size of my feet. I am not responsible for my feelings; I am responsible for what I do with them.”
In fact, it would be safe to say that we never live by our feelings, but by our principles.
If we lived by our emotions our principles would be called into question. Feelings are inconsistent and are only there to remind us that we are alive and not just existing, and to protect us when we interpret them as a warning e.g. Fear, embarrassment. Therefore, they must be given their proper place, behind our principles.
Our principles come from the Word of God, it is from the word we develop our value system, find wisdom and determine the way that we should go. The Lord gives us understanding and direction for our life living.
“I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.
Do not be like the horse or the mule, which have no understanding
but must be controlled by bit and bridle or they will not come to you. “(Palm 32:8-9)
We respond to life from God’s word first and then check out our feelings. We focus on what His word says and eventually our feelings come in line with God’s word. When God’s heart is known to us, our feelings eventually come in line with His feelings.
Always bring your life up to the level of the principles in God’s word and not the level of your feelings.
Test your feelings against truth, especially as you talk about your feelings to God, let Him put your feelings into perspective. Look how David did it in the following passage:
Why, my soul, are you downcast?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Saviour and my God. (Psalm 42:5)
Remember, something can feel absolutely wrong, but actually be totally right for you. Or, something can feel absolutely right and be totally wrong for you. Don’t try and feel yourself into your decision making and life directions, live on principles.
“There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death.” (Proverbs 14:12 and 16:25)
“And that means killing off everything connected with that way of death: sexual promiscuity, impurity, lust, doing whatever you feel like whenever you feel like it, and grabbing whatever attracts your fancy. That’s a life shaped by things and feelings instead of by God. “ (Colossians 3:5 MSG – my emphasis)
Lord, thank you that You gave me feelings in order to express how I feel and remind me that I am alive. But help me to submit my feelings to a daily test against your truth. You have plans for my life and I do not want my life derailed by paying more attention to how I am feeling, rather than Your Word. Help me to focus on Your direction for my life and not focus on my feelings. Help me bring my life and my emotions in line with Your principles for life.
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