What is it like to lose your first love? For many of us, it is a sad realisation.  However, what is sadder, is to lose that love and not even realise that you have lost it.  In the previous blog post we talked about how to know if you have lost your first love.  We said that:

Over a period of time, the enthusiastic and appreciative first love for God which we had when we first believed, has lost its zeal, the passion dies off and is replaced with service, perseverance and endurance.  The heart is more often characterized by indifference and is not so easily moved.  It demonstrates in a lack of compassion and over time, a lack of the confidence in the relationship we once had.  (Hebrews 10:32-35)

So now what?  What do we do when we have lost our first love?

Rev 2:5 describes this heart attitude that has fallen from love, as sin.  Jesus first calls us to repent, to admit to Him the state of our hearts.  If we refuse to acknowledge our sinful heart attitude the Lord warns that He will remove our lampstand, which is our influence in the world around us.  We are purposed to shine a “light in the world” (Matt 5:16), to be “children of the light” (1 Thessalonians 5:5) and if we don’t, we miss out on God’s purpose for our lives.  Purpose will be lost to all the “work” that we are engaged in.

firstlovejesusThen Jesus also tells us to remember.  When we lose our car keys, they are usually exactly where we left them!  If we can remember where we had our keys last, we can probably find them.  In verse 5, Jesus is saying “remember the heights from which you have fallen” i.e. remember the last time you were close to God.

Go back to that spiritual place and re-acquaint yourself with Him and there You will find Him.  He has not changed.  He has not moved.  He is just waiting for you to come back.  Paul believed in “stirring up” the passions of the early church in 2 Peter 1:13, he believed that it was good to remember what we appreciated about our salvation, what our old ‘love desires’ were, what decisions we took. In this way we feed and develop the hunger we had for the Lord.  Passion when fully stirred up, takes action.

Which brings us to Jesus’ third instruction “do the things you did at first,” which is an interesting principle since we may not feel love for Him and other people.  We start to love on purpose, despite our feelings, doing the things we did when we first fell in love with Jesus.  This is much the same as when married couples have lost their passion in the marriage, they do the things they did when first dating.  Go to the places they enjoyed, do the things they enjoyed, kiss and cuddle, talk for hours.  In doing so, it is possible to recapture the magic and emotions of first love.

firstlovedusWhat were the things we did “at first” when we became new believers?


We read scripture, regularly and positioned ourselves under good teaching.

We applied scripture to the situations in our lives and prayed about them.

We worshipped the Lord and practiced thankfulness for all He did for us.

We were appreciative of what our salvation meant to us.

We focused on the Kingdom of God and not the world around us.

We told others about God and shared testimony of what He had done for us.

We allowed God’s rules to reign in our life and practiced obedience

We offered ourselves as living sacrifices

So friend, repent.  Remember and do the things you used to do.  God will restore your first love in your heart because when we seek Him, with all our hearts, we find Him. (Acts 17:27)

Thank You Father for your word, that it teaches us the path that we are to take, even the path back to You as our First Love.  We agree Lord, that we have lost our first love: that appreciation of our salvation and our relationship with You.  We agree that you are no longer the focus of our hearts.  Please forgive us.  Help us to remember the paths we once took.  To remember our love and passion for you.  Help us to look back and remember Who it is that we loved.  Finally help us to do the things that once had such meaning for us, trusting that You will re-ignite love in us by Your Spirit, as You promised.

This post is part of a series of love:


Other Lovers

God Is Disappointed In Me

God Loves Others More Than Me

God Is Not With Me